deadken posted:last night i drank unjustifiably expensive cocktails in a strip club with a friend & we kissed in the taxi home. are we in love? do we depend on each other or are we just mutual enablers? aside from our shared interests in self-destruction, 20th century literature and the inherent absurdity of the world are we not two people trying to reach out across an unbridgeable gap, trapped in our own bodies no matter how much we fuck? are other people actually possible?
shut the fuck up you useless idiot
Superabound posted:swampman posted:you know, i hate to reduce it to this, but for a lot of you that means letting go of your completely unrealistic standards,
youd think that would be the case, but 9 times out of 10 the girls these guys end up crushing on are some random mousy bookish sadbrain chick who wont shut up about Doctor Who and the reason things dont work out isnt because shes out of their league but because theyve both been permanently socially retarded by self-diagnosed aspergers. imean who the fuck do you think is spending time on all these dating sites in the first place? i hate to burst your boner but all those HB9s are actually prostitutes
dont be obtuse. he takes someone he knows, usually the most attractive person he sees on an occasional basis, and then he lurks, or he tries to use friendship to infiltrate her daily life. and then there is a whole world of bullshit about whether the woman likes him or doesn't, whether she would "ever" date him or fuck him, what she thinks about him (she doesn't), and why doesn't she get it.
TG posted:i cant move, im tied to my place by the job that i love for at least the next couple years. thems the breaks :/
online dating is super unlikely, part of the problem of living in this town is that theres almost no internet presence. there arent even yelp reviews for places in town
i am actually in pretty good shape, as i work out 3-4 days a week.
my standards are probably too high, but i have a feeling im not ugly, i think its more of a personality thing. i am not a sadbrains depressed weirdo; i know how to interact with human beings, its a huge part of my job. i just think i have trouble giving off the vibe of being sexually attractive, my strategy is usually just to be funny and laidback and fun to talk to/chill with.
i am now mildly embarassed about making this thread all about myself and my cliche lady problems
i do think part of yer probs might be standards. you did negatively talk about women w/ kids as an issue.if you have the opportunity to get to know someone with kids, id say to do it unless they show signs theyre trying to use you as a replacement father.
the laidback fun thing is idk...if you are attractive people will find you attractive. if youre funny and not annying peopel will find you funny...i would wait a little while before introducing any1 to the rhizzone for sure....
dont let being 'friendzoned ' breed resentment. you really dont know what can happen in the future and you dont want burn bridges that can someday lead to what your looking for...
-saint just
Superabound posted:youd think that would be the case, but 9 times out of 10 the girls these guys end up crushing on are some random mousy bookish sadbrain chick who wont shut up about Doctor Who and the reason things dont work out isnt because shes out of their league but because theyve both been permanently socially retarded by self-diagnosed aspergers. imean who the fuck do you think is spending time on all these dating sites in the first place? i hate to burst your boner but all those HB9s are actually prostitutes
lol the last person i tried dating was really into lord of the rings. i think i dodged a bullet there
chickeon posted:not embracing and immersing yourself in patriarchal oppression is a heck of a good start to having a healthy attitude towards women and maybe seeing them as actual equals and n ot objects, not directly enabling their enslavement and subjugation, will make you capable of actually loving one
allowing yourself to think about your personal life in terms of swj/Feminist/MRA language is actually the very first step towards Never Being In Another Healthy Relationship For The Rest Of Your Life
Lysenko posted:lol the last person i tried dating was really into lord of the rings. i think i dodged a bullet there
witness the effects of "stinking thinking" on the meatmind. a big LOTR fan would probably love to go camping all the time. and think about how easy it would be to shop for someone with an LOTR obsession. and she'd probably still find you attractive as you age into a horrible troll. so many upsides.
Superabound posted:chickeon posted:
not embracing and immersing yourself in patriarchal oppression is a heck of a good start to having a healthy attitude towards women and maybe seeing them as actual equals and n ot objects, not directly enabling their enslavement and subjugation, will make you capable of actually loving one
allowing yourself to think about your personal life in terms of swj/Feminist/MRA language is actually the very first step towards Never Being In Another Healthy Relationship For The Rest Of Your Life
important lesson for rhizzoners here: classic Alpha's like Mao, Che or Stalin created for themselves some of the largest mate-selection pools in history by making themselves available, qualifying for preselection, being aloof and guarded with their time and most importantly, maintained frame! they never allowed themselves the weakness of actually believing the game they were spittin'
swampman posted:Lysenko posted:
lol the last person i tried dating was really into lord of the rings. i think i dodged a bullet there
witness the effects of "stinking thinking" on the meatmind. a big LOTR fan would probably love to go camping all the time. and think about how easy it would be to shop for someone with an LOTR obsession. and she'd probably still find you attractive as you age into a horrible troll. so many upsides.
having to always hide jewelry would be a pain in the ass
swampman posted:witness the effects of "stinking thinking" on the meatmind. a big LOTR fan would probably love to go camping all the time. and think about how easy it would be to shop for someone with an LOTR obsession. and she'd probably still find you attractive as you age into a horrible troll. so many upsides.
actually she hated nature and she dumped me. now she's asexual
Lysenko posted:swampman posted:
witness the effects of "stinking thinking" on the meatmind. a big LOTR fan would probably love to go camping all the time. and think about how easy it would be to shop for someone with an LOTR obsession. and she'd probably still find you attractive as you age into a horrible troll. so many upsides.
actually she hated nature and she dumped me. now she's asexual
'Come on babe, I can change, i can make you happy, just let me inside and we'll talk....please....precious?.....'
'THOU SHALT NOT PASS!'
swampman posted:dont be obtuse. he takes someone he knows, usually the most attractive person he sees on an occasional basis, and then he lurks, or he tries to use friendship to infiltrate her daily life. and then there is a whole world of bullshit about whether the woman likes him or doesn't, whether she would "ever" date him or fuck him, what she thinks about him (she doesn't), and why doesn't she get it.
lol look at these clowns, using FRIENDSHIP to get close to somebody they LIKE! what a bunch of clowns
Superabound posted:swampman posted:
dont be obtuse. he takes someone he knows, usually the most attractive person he sees on an occasional basis, and then he lurks, or he tries to use friendship to infiltrate her daily life. and then there is a whole world of bullshit about whether the woman likes him or doesn't, whether she would "ever" date him or fuck him, what she thinks about him (she doesn't), and why doesn't she get it.
lol look at these clowns, using FRIENDSHIP to get close to somebody they LIKE! what a bunch of clowns
well if 'get close to' means 'to sex' then yeah it's a bad move
less ass struggles
using Friendship to get a good deal on a used car: totally valid
using Friendship to get you good drugs: totally valid
using Friendship to get you access to a swimming pool: totally valid
using Frendship to let you play Super Mario Bros 3 because your parents are too poor to buy it for you: totally valid
using Friendship to get close to a person you care about more than any other human being on earth, to find out what theyre like, how they think, how they feel, their hopes, dreams, values, desires, worldview, to get both a general and in depth idea of what, of WHO this person really is deep down inside, BEFORE you have sex with them? what are you, some kind of objectifying misogynist??
conec posted:Ironicwarcriminal posted:
Ironicwarcriminal posted:
lol sorry, but yeah i get you. Seems that as we get older our relationships and their challenges take on an added poignancy and all of a sudden it's less about youthful sexuality than deep questions of compatibility and commitment
i guess this is growing up.
lol conec why did you downvote this
"we" "youthful sexuality" nasty horny little pigazoid boys and enslaved zombie wet puckey miniatures : do notte fuckenh include everyone in dis. not all share in the putrescence of the human spirit .. i m falling asleep in public
Sent from my iPhone
I know that 'intent doesn't matter' so i'm truly sorry for any harm that was caused. I really hope this doesn't come off as mansplaining but for context i said 'as we get older' which clearly isn't presented as being inclusive of people such as yourself who identify as diaper-clad infants. I see now how it might have come across as neoteny-shaming or triggered painful memories of taking on new responsibilities.
anyway, my apologies: in trying to lamely commiserate an old posting buddy when he's going some familiar turmoil, you didn't deserve to have such nasty horny pigazoid words soil your iphone. It's hard learning to show respect to women after so many years of socialized misogyny and i know it's not your job to educate me but thank you for taking the time to anyway!
Superabound posted:using Friendship to get you a job: totally valid
using Friendship to get a good deal on a used car: totally valid
using Friendship to get you good drugs: totally valid
using Friendship to get you access to a swimming pool: totally valid
using Frendship to let you play Super Mario Bros 3 because your parents are too poor to buy it for you: totally valid
using Friendship to get close to a person you care about more than any other human being on earth, to find out what theyre like, how they think, how they feel, their hopes, dreams, values, desires, worldview, to get both a general and in depth idea of what, of WHO this person really is deep down inside, BEFORE you have sex with them? what are you, some kind of objectifying misogynist??
all those examples involve getting access to material goods or lifestyle novelties rather than having another human take you inside their body
women as objects yet again, misogyny never changes
daddyholes posted:youll all want to gas this thread pretty soon so i suggest we do it now
don't talk down to us like you all that
Superabound posted:using Friendship to get you a job: totally valid
using Friendship to get a good deal on a used car: totally valid
using Friendship to get you good drugs: totally valid
using Friendship to get you access to a swimming pool: totally valid
using Frendship to let you play Super Mario Bros 3 because your parents are too poor to buy it for you: totally valid
absolutely none of these things are valid uses for "Friendship"
Ironicwarcriminal posted:all those examples involve getting access to material goods or lifestyle novelties rather than having another human take you inside their body
in the first examples, another human being is a means to an end
in the last example, another human being is the end in itself
please read your Kant
Superabound posted:using Friendship to get you a job: totally valid
using Friendship to get a good deal on a used car: totally valid
using Friendship to get you good drugs: totally valid
using Friendship to get you access to a swimming pool: totally valid
using Frendship to let you play Super Mario Bros 3 because your parents are too poor to buy it for you: totally valid
using Friendship to get close to a person you care about more than any other human being on earth, to find out what theyre like, how they think, how they feel, their hopes, dreams, values, desires, worldview, to get both a general and in depth idea of what, of WHO this person really is deep down inside, BEFORE you have sex with them? what are you, some kind of objectifying misogynist??
let the girl decide who's an objectifying misogynist i.m.h.o.
nothing about this is inherently rational & it's the women that have been stalked by shitbags and opportunists since they were kids. they have the right to say whats repulsive or abusive
also ur being weird dude
swampman posted:Just the other day I was telling my ex-friend, "We aren't going to play any Super Mario 3? Then why the fuck am I friends with you?"
that might be a bad example because i would totally say that shit to a friend.
swampman posted:Superabound posted:using Friendship to get you a job: totally valid
using Friendship to get a good deal on a used car: totally valid
using Friendship to get you good drugs: totally valid
using Friendship to get you access to a swimming pool: totally valid
using Frendship to let you play Super Mario Bros 3 because your parents are too poor to buy it for you: totally validabsolutely none of these things are valid uses for "Friendship"
congratulations on your rich parents
roseweird posted:deadken posted:roseweird posted:deadken posted:in an attempt to either know true love or destroy myself emotionally i am very methodically sleeping with all my female friends
maybe youre looking in thewrong places and should sleep (methodically) with all your male friends
i dont have very many male friends actually. one or two of them would probably be up for it but i just don't really have any inclinations in that direction
hmm well have you considered that gay boys often have excellent quality crystal
I throw bareback tops parties at my crib for exclusively this reason
i do try really hard to get outside myself and view the situation in a healthy way. i know nobody owes me anything romantic or sexual, but does that make me happy that im not getting any romantic or sexual attention? like i said, my normal reaction to this situation is to continue just being friends and subsuming my romantic feelings, coming to grips with the fact that theyre unrequited and enjoying a fruitful relationship with a number of women in my life. its really great to have people who enjoy my company and trust me and that i have a connection with on a personal level
im just despairing a bit because im in a rough situation where meeting women that i have a lot in common with is looking pretty unlikely
strangely enough, i knew my last ex for 3-4 months as a close friend before we started dating, so i know its possible. its also possible that that was an outlier and its giving me false hope
i do find it interesting that nobody ive shared with has advised me to just tell her how i feel and see how that goes. i could see it getting awkward, but i think itd make me feel better because id at least have taken a positive step and gotten something off my chest. best case scenario, it turns out she feels the same way and was just waiting for me to do something, worst case, she gently tells me she doesnt and i take a little break to let my wounded heart heal, which shell probably be understanding about
iwc, my humor is not really self-deprecating any more, i was like that in my early 20s but realized it wasnt really healthy. i think youre spot on about the not being assertive when i have romantic feelings though. in an ideal world i wouldnt be expected to make the first move. i guess im just some sort of beta??
also im currently reading caliban and the witch so dont you dare question my feminist credentials