#1
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Over 50 killed and 200 wounded in gun attack at musical concert in Las Vegas, USA. The dead bastard is identified as Mr Stephen Paddock, a 60 something year old America Whiteman and non-wizard.

"The gun went thu-thu-thu-thu-thu very fast. It did not sound foreign or like magic at all," said a survivor witness.

Authorities assure the public Mr Paddock, with his non-Wizard sounding name and good white american gunweapon, is NOT terror.

"This man was no wizard, and he is now dead," says LV Policeman. "Please relax."

DEVELOPING...
#2
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every time one of these happens like forty people report in detail what bullshit 4chan is trying to cook up about it in real time, for some unfathomable reason. truly me having to look at 4chan screenshots places me among the wounded
#3
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don't mind me, reflexively looking at the far-right internet sleuth crew and shouting into a megaphone whatever theory they've stumbled into believing
#4
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.

Edited by Flying_horse_in_saudi_arabia ()

#5
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ok so let m e get this straight, a 64 year old white man opens fire from a giant golden hotel into a las vegas country music festival killing 59 people and injuring hundreds. On breaking into his room on the 32nd floor the police find him suicided along with his collection of 23 guns + specialised stocks, oversized mags and telescopic sights. The room and the outside coridor are wired up with hidden cameras. On looking into his background they find no "my twisted world" manifestos, no far right internet presence. Instead they find that he was a multi-millionaire but no body knows how, owned numerous properties as a landlord, spent much time living in las vegas casinos and about twenty other locations, one of which had his collection of another 19 guns, he frequently gambled over $10,000 at a time depositing hundreds of thousands of dollars, owned two planes and had a pilots licence, wired $100,000 to the phillipenes shortly before and was a former employee of lockheed martin *thinking for a while* gonna put this one in the spooky pile for now
#6
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tears posted:

gonna put this one in the spooky pile for now


the highstakes gambling screams money laundering, which seems needlessly inefficient if he was formally on spook payroll. my guess is he was some kind of merc.

#7
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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my guess is he is a standard resident of mesquite nevada with a nonstandard emotional disorder
#8
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as long as we can all agree he was Mentally Ill, the common denominator of all nonwizard violence attacks, obviating the need for any further analysis.
#9
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wait. i'm still confused. who decided he's not a wizard?
#10
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n/m

Edited by orchestra_hit ()

#11
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hey posted:

wait. i'm still confused. who decided he's not a wizard?


Well, everyone is just observing the fact that he can't be a wizard because of his name, skin color, etc. The decision was down to The Lord Our God.

#12
Online
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yer a wizard harry
#13
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whoa wait we can have animated avatars now O_O
#14
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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i was thinking about writing a thing about what mesquite nevada is like but the fundamental issue is how boring it is. you already know what it's like if you've ever been to the desert 'burbs outside phoenix or los angeles or abq or dallas. just old whites who are not very good at golf and voted trump at rates of over 90% and can never handle being cold for a single day of the year despite being incredibly fat
#15
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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mesquite nevada was also in the news pretty recently for being the place where that gaggle of dipshits staged the armed protest to support slavery apologist cliven bundy and his desire to not have to pay the government seriously like $2 a year per head of cattle for grazing rights, a figure for which i could not feed a hamster. it's a town with a permanent population of 10,000 with zero black people and five 18-hole golf courses and is 40 miles from any population bigger than a few hundred, that being the burgeoning mormon quiverfull nightmare of St. George where every woman at the walmart under 40 is pregnant and pushing a cart with four kids in it while possibly dressed in handmaidens tale cosplay, and 80 miles from Las Vegas across some of the ugliest, most barren landscape in the western hemisphere. aside from the casinos, mexican restaurant and the mexican market i would not be surprised to learn that literally every single business in the town is a chain
#16
[account deactivated]
#17
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le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

quiverfull


#18
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the forum sharply divides between those who dare to dream big and those who think this duder suffered the ultimate mental disorder: being a white male amerikkkan. to those on the fence let me just show you something *gesturing towards corkboard covered in bits of paper and red string* now if youll just look at thi
#19
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BREAKING: Nonwizard gunman Steve Paddocks may have had an accomplice who knows??, according to police.

smh dot com dot au posted:

Sheriff Lombardo said he believed Paddock was not acting alone.

"You've got to make the assumption that he had to have some help at some point," he said. "Maybe he's super powered working out all of this on his own but it's hard to believe that."


incredible to think a regular non-wizard americaman could amass a bunch of gun's and decide to use them to kill as many people as possible. how could this happen

#20
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https://www.cbsnews.com/videos/the-brother-of-las-vegas-gunman-stephen-paddock-speaks-for-a-second-time/ it's facinating how this guy can't really help himself from defending the character of his mass-murderer brother, not so much because of facts or memories relating to how they were siblings but because "it was fun to hang out with steve because he was a rich guy who hung out in hotels," and that he was a good guy to his girlfriend (who other sources have stated that he routinely treated like garbage) for transfering a 100,000 dollars to the phillapines
#21
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maybe this guys is a sorcerer or a mage. I don't fucking know
#22
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BREAKING -- Responsibility for Las Vegas attack claimed by The Magic Circle: "Oi guvna, 'e was a conjurer innit"
#23
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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if you want to know why we're never going to do anything about climate change, look to the american desert shithole. phoenix is the 5th largest city in the country and there was never any reason for it to be there. it never had any industry or natural resources or position on a shipping lane or even a quirk like legalized gambling. the best you could say is that it had an aquifer and ready access to brown near-slave labor. everybody there knows on some level that when the easy water runs out it's a ghost town and if the power goes out for two hours in summer thousands of people will die, but they keep right on buying property there
#24
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its mindblowing just how new and pointless some of America's biggest cities are. Wikipedia says Phoenix had 65,000 people in 1940. Miami's the same way, had 1500 people in 1900, there was almost literally no one in all of southern florida until the 1920
#25
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thirdplace posted:

its mindblowing just how new and pointless some of America's biggest cities are is.


#26
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tears posted:

thirdplace posted:

its mindblowing just how new and pointless some of America's biggest cities are is.


#27
[account deactivated]
#28
Dont Mess With Sucess
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Theory: Wizards from another continent were controlling this ordinary chump's brain, probably via a scrying crystal of some kind. We should remember that the way this guy made a living - decades of feeding off the life blood of people who resided within the demesne bound to him by scrolls inscribed with the liturgical tongue, supplemented with alchemical experiments to try and cause his gold to multiply - was decidedly non-magical
#29
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its insane what these russian wizards are willing to stoop to
#30
Online
Post rating: +++++

le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

if you want to know why we're never going to do anything about climate change, look to the american desert shithole. phoenix is the 5th largest city in the country and there was never any reason for it to be there. it never had any industry or natural resources or position on a shipping lane or even a quirk like legalized gambling. the best you could say is that it had an aquifer and ready access to brown near-slave labor. everybody there knows on some level that when the easy water runs out it's a ghost town and if the power goes out for two hours in summer thousands of people will die, but they keep right on buying property there


Lots of college towns end up getting pretty big, so it makes sense for a big city to build up around the hallowed halls of the University of Phoenix.

#31
UNUSUALY COOL
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shriekingviolet posted:

whoa wait we can have animated avatars now O_O



the power was inside you all along

#32
UNUSUALY COOL
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le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

if you want to know why we're never going to do anything about climate change, look to the american desert shithole. phoenix is the 5th largest city in the country and there was never any reason for it to be there. it never had any industry or natural resources or position on a shipping lane or even a quirk like legalized gambling. the best you could say is that it had an aquifer and ready access to brown near-slave labor. everybody there knows on some level that when the easy water runs out it's a ghost town and if the power goes out for two hours in summer thousands of people will die, but they keep right on buying property there



it's pretty funny to look at from up high, like the worst sim city

#33
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cars posted:

it's pretty funny to look at from up high, like the worst sim city


i will never stop loving the endoplasmic reticulum that is the american suburbs viewed from the sky









#34
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#35
[account deactivated]
#36
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