#1361
Post rating: +
you should rework your resume to just show university and then explain u were in a coma for ten years
#1362
Post rating: +
I was taking care of a family member for the past decade. Myself.
#1363
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
Post rating: ~

getfiscal posted:

that keven joke about backstreet boys reminds me of conan's favourite joke by andy richter. basically sting was on their show one day and i guess sting had some indian food or something and went into his dressing room. and when he opened the door there was a horrific smell and everyone was grossed out. so andy turned to conan and said "sting, more like.... SMELLY".




*dressing room reeks of fish instead of indian food*

"Sting, more like...GORTON'S SUMMONER"

#1364
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
Post rating: +

Soviet_Salami posted:

I was taking care of a family member for the past decade. Myself.



i was held in a prison camp for ten years after innocently hiking across the Iranian border

#1365
Post rating: +
If they ask just say to quote rage against the machine: it has to start somehow. What better place than here / what better time that now? Oh! Hell! Killing in the name of! Lights out! Gorilla radio!"
#1366
Post rating: +
Im so powerful I'm practically vibrating with energy _im beyond all previous levels... This isn't a joke! Every single yr since I quit drinking I get stronger and stronger! I'm like a lord of the rings elf now basically + I might be aging in reverse.
#1367
Post rating: +
Baby teeth sublimating out of nowhere, grinding your molars into your skull.
#1368
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: ~

Keven posted:

Im so powerful I'm practically vibrating with energy _im beyond all previous levels... This isn't a joke! Every single yr since I quit drinking I get stronger and stronger! I'm like a lord of the rings elf now basically + I might be aging in reverse.

that's good.

#1369
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: ~
i have a pretty specific list of things i want to do over the next few years. i have a lot of inertia from when i was more depressed though. like some days i leave at 8am to take a train and get home at 8pm, then i have to spend a day just vegetating because it's so exhausting for me. it's all very good though. i mean i'd much rather be tired from doing semi-inane things than just laying about in anxious pain all day. i'm developing more of a plan now but it was good to sort of test things for two months.
#1370
Poronto
Post rating: ~
the toilet at my house broke and the tank won't fill up. i mean it will fill up but in an insulting slow manner, the water trickles in drop by drop by drop and it takes an entire day to fill up so we can only flush the toilet once at day at the end of the day and my entire house smells like Kinshasa
#1371
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: ~

littlegreenpills posted:

the toilet at my house broke and the tank won't fill up. i mean it will fill up but in an insulting slow manner, the water trickles in drop by drop by drop and it takes an entire day to fill up so we can only flush the toilet once at day at the end of the day and my entire house smells like Kinshasa

just get a short-term luxury vacation rental until they fix your toilet, cheers.

#1372
Dont Mess With Sucess
Post rating: +

littlegreenpills posted:

the toilet at my house broke and the tank won't fill up. i mean it will fill up but in an insulting slow manner, the water trickles in drop by drop by drop and it takes an entire day to fill up so we can only flush the toilet once at day at the end of the day and my entire house smells like Kinshasa

Take a couple gallons of water from a different tap and dump it into the bowl you incompetents

#1373
Dont Mess With Sucess
Post rating: ~
https://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/Wikijunior:How_Things_Work/Flush_Toilet#How_does_it_get_power.3F
#1374
Dont Mess With Sucess
Post rating: +
Back on topic, let's place bets for what Obama becomes after his presidency. I am putting $30 on famous ventriloquist and $10 on gas station attendant.
#1375
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: +

swampman posted:

Back on topic, let's place bets for what Obama becomes after his presidency. I am putting $30 on famous ventriloquist and $10 on gas station attendant.

- presidential library at howard
- acts regretful at inability to fundamentally change things due to republicans
- mountains of speakers fees
- speaks entirely in dalai lama -level platitudes

#1376
Post rating: +
here's a joke instead:

Q: why did the farmer start listening to punk rock?

A: because he was tired of haulin' oats! (hall & oates)

Edited by postposting ()

#1377
Poronto
Post rating: ~

swampman posted:

littlegreenpills posted:

the toilet at my house broke and the tank won't fill up. i mean it will fill up but in an insulting slow manner, the water trickles in drop by drop by drop and it takes an entire day to fill up so we can only flush the toilet once at day at the end of the day and my entire house smells like Kinshasa

Take a couple gallons of water from a different tap and dump it into the bowl you incompetents



this is what i do. my wife finds it too complicated so she just lets her waste sit there and percolate

#1378
Post rating: ~
im pretty sure that im destined to have a wife like yours and i think its gonna own
#1379
Post rating: +
lol seriously lgp. stop being such a sad sack and *goon voice* fuckin sever, nuke her from orbit
#1380
Poronto
Post rating: +
she posts on www.libfemsocialdemocracy.com about how i continually eat my boogers and jerk off to m4m craigslist ads so basically we're good for each other
#1381
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
Post rating: +

Superabound posted:

getfiscal posted:

that keven joke about backstreet boys reminds me of conan's favourite joke by andy richter. basically sting was on their show one day and i guess sting had some indian food or something and went into his dressing room. and when he opened the door there was a horrific smell and everyone was grossed out. so andy turned to conan and said "sting, more like.... SMELLY".

*dressing room reeks of fish instead of indian food*

"Sting, more like...GORTON'S SUMMONER"



see its funny because...Sting's real name is Gordon Sumner...and Gorton's is a brand of fish stick........you know what, fuck you guys

#1382
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
Post rating: ~
lol are still with the woman who cheated on you
#1383
political car tune
Post rating: +

le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

lol are still

#1384
Post rating: ~

dipshit420 posted:

le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

lol are still



lol

#1385
Post rating: +
Watching his wife getting fucked by a portly ineffectual scholar of early Chaucer, a man who was judged to be his better, lgp chuckles softly to himself thinking of that days grammar fails.
#1386
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
Post rating: ~
Keven, that sentence is a lot like me: missing u
#1387
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: +
i'm glad lgp takes the sacrament of marriage more seriously than the peanut gallery here
#1388
Post rating: ~

getfiscal posted:

i'm glad lgp takes the sacrament of marriage more seriously than the peanut gallery here


#1389
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
Post rating: +

Keven posted:

Watching his wife getting fucked by a portly ineffectual scholar of early Chaucer, a man who was judged to be his better, lgp chuckles softly to himself thinking of that days grammar fails.



*grammer

#1390
Post rating: ~

le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

lol are still with the woman who cheated on you



Lol are still you homeschooling your daughter ai fucking hope not lmao.

#1391
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
Post rating: +
i would never homeschool my daughter, except as a troll
#1392
Post rating: +
damn sounds like william blum is on his last legs

Dear Comrades,
This is to inform you that starting immediately I'll be taking a break from sending out my monthly Anti-Empire Report. The reasons for this are as follows:

Burnt out: After more than a dozen years of putting out the report, because US foreign policy keeps repeating itself, with the same lies, I too often find myself repeating the same ideas I've expressed before, often in more or less the same words.
I also feel the effect of day after day, year after year, intensively reading and seeing images of the human horrors; not just the horrors, but the lies and the stupidity.

Health: I'm 82, and I'm suffering from Chronic Kidney Disease, in its final stage. The main symptom of this at present is rather serious fatigue. I expect that within the next year or so I'll have to be on dialysis or receive a kidney transplant.

I hope that before too long I'll be able to submit an article to some of the Internet magazines.

Keep ... the faith ... in touch ... on trucking,
Bill

#1393
Post rating: ~
Hasn't watched the Shia Labeouf motivation video yet, ehh he's 82, give him another week to catch up on his memes
#1394
Occupied Aztlan
Post rating: +
poor guy. if dear reader isnt familiar, i highly recommend checking him out, as well as the whole 'expose spooks' US scene.

i spent today tabling, a poor decision given the heat, but we got enough sigs to meet campus charter requirements so now they have to pay for all our flyers.

Edited by Urbandale ()

#1395
Post rating: ~
#1396
Post rating: ~
hey has anyone gone to a Jacobin "discussion group" and are they as awful as one would expect?
#1397
Post rating: ~
im not joking, but joke responses are appreciated. thanks, in advance.
#1398
penitent
Post rating: ~
i have not but my relationship with my wife is open and loving and i have never been happier
#1399
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: +

VoxNihili posted:

hey has anyone gone to a Jacobin "discussion group" and are they as awful as one would expect?

Just go. What else were you going to do? Watch gamer thrones with your thumb up your ass? Get out there!

#1400
UNUSUALY COOL
Post rating: +

aerdil posted:

damn sounds like william blum is on his last legs

Dear Comrades,
This is to inform you that starting immediately I'll be taking a break from sending out my monthly Anti-Empire Report. The reasons for this are as follows:

Burnt out: After more than a dozen years of putting out the report, because US foreign policy keeps repeating itself, with the same lies, I too often find myself repeating the same ideas I've expressed before, often in more or less the same words.
I also feel the effect of day after day, year after year, intensively reading and seeing images of the human horrors; not just the horrors, but the lies and the stupidity.

Health: I'm 82, and I'm suffering from Chronic Kidney Disease, in its final stage. The main symptom of this at present is rather serious fatigue. I expect that within the next year or so I'll have to be on dialysis or receive a kidney transplant.

I hope that before too long I'll be able to submit an article to some of the Internet magazines.

Keep ... the faith ... in touch ... on trucking,
Bill



ask him to do knowledge transfer about his sources & methods to hk or someone. when you and Bill blum hang out. tell him