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PARIS, EUROPE: Wednesday afternoon, and Paris is in lockdown following the latest in a series of horrific attacks by a group of alleged Islamic wizards.

In the early hours of mid morning, multiple masked and cloaked wizard men burst into the offices of lauded French satirical journal Ne Pas d'Islamisme, shouting what onhearers described as "some Islamic Harry Potter shit".

Approximately one dozen people were subsequently hit by a shower of lightening bolts from the wizards's wands and/or fingertips and killed dead.

The Islamic wizards then made their escape. Caught on internet video now spreading virally through cyber means, the wizards stepped onto a waiting rug, hovering 10-15 feet above the Paris streets before disappearing like a baguette placed before a ravenous street urchin.

Gendarmes are yet to make an official statement, but wizard experts speculate the attack is linked to recent incidents in France wherein the bodies of innocents were rent asunder by the grill of an erratic speeding Fiat. In those cases, the driver was also said to have shouted "Islamic wizard stuff" before transforming his vehicle into a piece of carpet through sheer force of will and similarly vanishing.

"We know these wizards are motivated by a virulent combination of militant Islam and young adult fantasy novels. We know they are ruthless in their methods," Professor Wizard Expert, noted wizard expert, said. "What we don't know is this: where have all these wizards gone? It is a mystery."
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hi
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bb bourgeoisie
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tpaine posted:

does anybody else have any funny tweets, aim convos, facebook statuses, myspace posts, instragrams, pinterests, okcupid pms, etc



no but not for lack of trying

#7
political car tune
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tpaine posted:

does anybody else have any funny tweets, aim convos, facebook statuses, myspace posts, instragrams, pinterests, okcupid pms, etc


GBS thread is going pretty much as expected:
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3692940&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1

#8
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meanwhile the rhizzone carries on hebdo's commitment to satire with this tribute to the fallen
#9
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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what they mean is mass expulsion and it's closer than you think

Edited by discipline ()

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#12
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*goatsteine cracks his knuckles* here's some education for you: if France doesn't do it, I'm gonna do it for them *hefts his katana*
#13
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what's the greater crime here, really. when will bad art become a felony?
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political car tune
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#15
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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"love is stronger than hate"



lol
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lol 6 hours. bigpeeler that fuckin dude
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#18
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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discipline posted:

le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

discipline posted:

x: its a growing problem
discipline: what is
x: islamism
dispo: hahahaha
x: sooner or later you are going to have a real backlash in one way or another
x: the right will capitalise off of this in france big style
dispo: yah I’m sure in no time the west will be bombing muslim countries and levying sanctions while opening black site prisons, passing dress code laws and drumming up popular hatred which may result in satirical newspapers printing cartoons of mohammad’s taint etc

what they mean is mass expulsion and it's closer than you think

educate me



it's impossible to overstate how much the average western person dislikes muslims. basically the only ones that dont are radical leftists and muslims themselves (and even in those cases it's negotiable)

#19
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im a muslim and im fine w/ muslims i just dont like arabs
#20
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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reddit is stormfront atm. Your Reddit Update
#21
political car tune
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lol

actually, it's about ethics in satirical journalism

#22
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you must read THIS many issues of mad magazine to prove your fealty to western europe
#23
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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#KillAllMuslims is trending on twitter
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mt.real
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le_nelson_mandela_face posted:

#KillAllMuslims is trending on twitter


are you sure

i mean, i'd believe it, but i'd like to know if you saw that yourself or if someone was just mumbling it somewhere

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https://mobile.twitter.com/search?q=killallmuslims&s=typd&x=0&y=0
#26
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don't lump the evil terror muslims with the good ones that b;laspheme mohammed just like we do
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#28
Poronto
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houllebecq will convert before the year is out
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or he will die
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#31
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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get an army of one billion muslims in one place and you'll have one billion and one schisms by the afternoon
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goatstein i hope you're raising your daughter muslim and aren't gonna make her go to hell just because of your own bigoted atheist ideas
#33
"Jpg." - Hank Hill
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EmanuelaBrolandi posted:

goatstein i hope you're raising your daughter muslim and aren't gonna make her go to hell just because of your own bigoted atheist ideas



ya. im gonna sell her to some islamojoffrey for one million dollar

#34
Mike Nelson here.
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yeah i'm going to convert too. islam is clearly winning.
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oops
#36
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It sure is heartwarming when the demagogues of la France profonde and the Euro loving wanna-be philosophes of Paris come together out of shared hatred of the Mahometan.






#37
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take a shot for every instance of "barbarian/savage" on your fb feed today because fuck it, it's welp wednesday
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Considering how the last attempt to make a Europe for Europeans ended (see 1939-1945), and how things are going right now, that all of this will lead to an attempt to expulse the Muslims from Europe is certainly not out of the question.

On the hopeful side,that previous attempt to erase those associated with a Semitic religion did lead to Europe being being bankrupted and reorganized on better lines by democratic and/or socialist movements backed by Moscow and Washington....
#39
UNUSUALY COOL
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i checked with some americans and they don't care about anything
#40
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KiDSoT5vy-I

Prince Andrew the Duke of York, NATO Secretary General and former Norwegian Prime Minister Jens Stoltenberg, and Blackwater founder Erik Prince are sitting in a Swiss chalet, warming themselves around a log fire after a hard days' skiing.

"If I eat one more s'more, I swear fellas, I'm gonna explode!" laughs Erik Prince.

"Same here!" says Prince Andrew, patting his royal belly. "I say, it's time for a game. Alright chaps - what's the closest you've come to getting caught doing something embarrassing?"

The men all laugh ruefully. Erik Prince's eyes flash with mischief. "You first then, Andy!"

"Oh Erik! Alright then." Prince Andrew's eyes narrow, and he breaks into a playful smirk. "I remember the time one of Jeffrey's little friends gave me a bad massage. I was trying to discipline her, and I accidentally snapped her wee neck!" Prince Andrew chortles. "I had to give Jeff's gardener 20 quid to deal with that!"

"Hahaha!" laughs Erik Prince. "That reminds me of this one time in Kandahar..."

"Oh, here we go again," groans Jens Stoltenberg. "We all know about the fucking Kandahar thing!"

Erik Prince immediately catches himself and joins the rest in even more raucous laughter. "Ha ha, alright Jens! What about you then?"

Jens Stoltenberg suddenly becomes quiet, looking pensive. Suddenly he snorts. "Remember Anders Breivik?"