Before 1994, when North Korea was ruled by Kim Il Sung, people were distributed food rations from the government. At that time, you really didn’t have much to be worried about when you finished all your given work for the day. People believed that they were enjoying the happiest life on earth in reward for their consistent loyalty to their leader. At that time, the government’s propaganda seemed to be working pretty well.

However, the situation has since changed. Far from receiving regular food rations, these days even the water and electricity supply is limited. People have to manage on their own through the markets, instead of depending on the government like they once did. Furthermore, there is too much information coming in now from the outside. As such, people don’t believe everything told to them by the government as they once did.

However, I would assume that 20% to 30% of North Koran people still take the propaganda from the government as the complete truth. I myself used to be a living proof of the propaganda education. My father, who was a military officer, raised his kids as radical communists. Because what I learned at school exactly matched with what my father told me, I did not have to question anything.

“I myself used to be a living proof of the propaganda education”

Father used to tell me that we North Koreans had been liberated from Japanese colonization and American threats only because the people had worshiped their leader so sincerely. He said without our leader, Kim Il Sung, we would have had to live miserably just like the Japanese or South Koreans – who were deprived of all basic dignities as human beings.

Growing up I once heard horrible stories about a Korean girl who went to school in Hanbok (Korean traditional costume) and had her Hanbok ripped off with a knife by her Japanese classmates. I also heard about South Korean kids who had to shine shoes of American soldiers to earn their own tuition. Listening to those stories of our fellow Koreans, my little heart was broken with sympathy and I often thought about possible ways to bring all those people to North Korea. But my father told me that it was because of the South Korean government and the U.S. that these people could not come to North Korea even though they wanted to. He concluded that this was why we should drive the U.S. military out of the Korean peninsula as soon as possible and reunify Korea. That was the only way that North Korean people and South Korean people could prosper together, he told me.

When I was a kid, in my eyes my father was truly a great person. He always put other people’s happiness before his own and he lived his life primarily for the community, society and nation that he belonged to. I was deeply proud of my father, who was so different from others. I often thought I wanted to be an even greater person than him and from time to time, I pictured myself becoming a party officer or an army executive member, even though I was a girl.

“My conclusion was that I should be loyal to the government”

Looking back, thanks to my father’s education, I was inspired to think thoroughly about the real definition of our society, community and nation, and agonized over what is a meaningful and valuable life to live. My conclusion from all those thoughts was that I should be loyal to the government. I believe this conclusion contributed to my later decision to serve in the military army with a gun on my shoulder. Even though the decision was a complex outcome of many different factors, I felt great pride and satisfaction working my nation’s military.