#1
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So I answered the door this afternoon to be greeted by a young man and woman.

The guy introduces himself in a French accent, “Hello! What’s your name?”

“Uh…” I reply, eyes wandering to the binders they were carrying.

“Ah! I see! You’re drinking a coke? Or is it a whiskey and coke?” He grinned at me and pointed to the glass in my hand.

“No, just coke… who?” I really wanted to close the door on this guy.

“We’re from Pehjagkhjfsg Unggnashd and we’re a development charity looking for donations. My name is Peter.” And he holds out a tiny laminated card with a picture and maybe a name on it with some generic blue hug icon.

“No, I’m not in a position to make donations right now, sorry.” I am bodily as far away from this guy as I can be without letting go of the door.

“Ah but we are not looking for donations we are looking for a subscription - it would not even happen right now and” I was closing the door repeating,

“No, no, no, no. Thank you.”

Then he was gone.

Four hours later, maybe twenty minutes after I got home, there’s another knock on the door.

It’s him again, by himself. I leave the screen door closed and just look at him.

“Ah! I’ve been here before. Are you parents home?” He asked chirpily. He didn’t seem to have a binder now.

“No, my parents? Hm.”

I looked him in the eye.

“You’re on my land now, a long way from home. You’re no match for me here. I can take my time, whittling away at you from the hills. There’s not a thing you can do to stop the slow creep of my trenches towards you. This terrible weather’s grounded all of your aircraft. This rain isn’t going to stop for weeks. You might get a few thousand foreign legionnaires to fill muddy graves for a France they’ve never seen, but no help is coming for you.”

He knew it was true.

He’d been here before.

There was nothing left for him to do but name the hills after his girlfriends and watch them fall one by one.

“Drink up, mon ami, the night is just beginning.”
#2
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dont you mean successes op
#3
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nah man, success for nationalism
#4
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All of them. Op.
#5
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any personal victories?
#6
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Vietnam was a success for America, lol at all the weepy liberals who got a ridiculous narrative of 'failure' from forrest gump
#7
Dont Mess With Sucess
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Ironicwarcriminal posted:

Vietnam was a success for America, lol at all the weepy liberals who got a ridiculous narrative of 'failure' from forrest gump

Yes... lol at those people... ???

#8
tardy on these heaters
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#9
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the existence of a unified Vietnam under a communist banner would kind of suggest an American failure.

one of the few countries to reject mcdonalds after liberalisation lol
#10
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thanks for the kitchen tips this is live changing
*bassline starts as tim reaches for the mayo*
#11
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Epic Fails of imperialism! Kids react to SS Mayaguez rescue mission!!!
#12
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swirlsofhistory posted:



Belgium Eats the Congo and goes CRAZY!

#13
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#14
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#15
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Russian dressing tastes really disappointing on salads. I was surprised because I've been spreading it thick on my hot dogs and sandwiches for ages, normally the stuff is like ambrosia to me. Weird.
#16
Kurdt
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#17
[account deactivated]
#18
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you should be ashamed of yoursleves for your crimes against food
#19
tardy on these heaters
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swirlsofhistory posted:

Russian dressing tastes really disappointing on salads. I was surprised because I've been spreading it thick on my hot dogs and sandwiches for ages, normally the stuff is like ambrosia to me. Weird.



why would you expect ketchup and mayo taste good on a salad lol

#20
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
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babyfinland posted:

why would you expect ketchup and mayo taste good on a salad lol



American

#21
Kurdt
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tom has opinion on salad
#22
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yeah that sounds fucking gross, a dash of balsamic is all you need
#23
[account deactivated]
#24
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Superabound posted:

babyfinland posted:

why would you expect ketchup and mayo taste good on a salad lol

American

i'm eatin an italian sausage wrapped in a tortillia at this very moment

#25
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
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the best salad i ever had (by far) had fucking pears in it and i thought the pears would be really gross but they were really good, probably also the best pears i ever had in my life. the dressing was really good too. i guess you could say im a bit of a salad aficionado now
#26
UNUSUALY COOL
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do you know what they call a asshole in prison? yup-i-oh. Salad
#27
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what does a gay horse eat? haaaaayyy
#28
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failures of imperialism in this forum
FOIITF
#29
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JatzMusik posted:

the existence of a unified Vietnam under a communist banner would kind of suggest an American failure.

one of the few countries to reject mcdonalds after liberalisation lol



http://english.vietnamnet.vn/fms/business/75616/mcdonald-s-is-coming-to-vietnam.html

31/05/2013

McDonald’s senior officials have visited Vietnam to talk to prospective franchisees and planning is now under way for the first stores. The real opening time is likely to be far less than two years, depending on McDonald's ability to ensure a reliable and secure supply chain of fresh ingredients and complete its complex training program of franchisees and then staff.

The American fastfood chain - a notable absence in the market which is dominated by KFC, Pizza Hut and Korea's Lotte-owned Lotteria - plans to open two outlets in Ho Chi Minh before expanding to Hanoi.

Long term it plans 100 outlets, according to the unidentified official.

McDonald’s has 33,500 outlets worldwide in 119 countries but has been slow to target Vietnam, which has mystified rivals and observers given Vietnamese population's rapid acceptance of fast food.

Meanwhile, fellow US chain Burger King is about to start an aggressive rollout in the major cities after trialling stores at airport terminals in Ho Chi Minh City and Hanoi for more than six months. Billboards have appeared in downtown Ho Chi Minh City during the last week proclaiming "Burger King comes to town", citing an October launch. Stores are planned in 11 districts of Ho Chi Minh City and six in Hanoi, along with the provincial centres of Da Nang and Hoi An.

#30
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#31
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this is now a roll call thread
#32
tardy on these heaters
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Rolls, please
#33
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not enough rolls on the planet to fill that maw
#34
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tip-car trains backed up for hundreds of miles, c-130s landing round the clock, scores upon scores of trucks arrive by the minute. dozens of air traffic controllers traffic engineers and logisticians work grinding hours to manage the titanic demands. turnover attrition rates are staggering as even the most seasoned shipping managers are ground into sniveling wrecks by the crippling workload. vast swathes of arable land pressganged into service as global wheat production struggles to meat the unceasing demand. oilfeilds run dry and mountains are leveled to fuel the massive ovens. Tom wants rolls.
#35
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What about the Triumphs of imperialism?
#36
Not Your S.H.I.E.L.D.
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slumlord posted:

this is now a roll call thread



Khambot

Bippy

Tom Findland

CrOOOOW!

#37
Kurdt
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slumlord posted:

this is now a roll call thread

crunk is dead

#38
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Superabound posted:

slumlord posted:

this is now a roll call thread

Khambot

Bippy

Tom Findland

CrOOOOW!

getiing this ref

#39
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MadMedico posted:

What about the Triumphs of imperialism?


Edited by slumlord ()

#40
[account deactivated]